i went out with my hockey team last night. i don’t know, but at some part i ended up standing in a corner of the bar by myself. and all of a sudden images started flowing through my head. austria, sweden, finland, belgium – now being back here. all of a sudden i felt lonely. i was surrounded by people i knew and who knew me – but nevertheless they all faded away. can you feel lonesome in a crowd, a bar, a busy street? while everybody got drunk, i had about 5 cokes (i had to drive home) – and at some point on that 40 km drive home i found out why. while there’s the hockey team experience we share three times a week, i am wondering if i belong to them. am i one of them? (what a trivial question you might ask..) but to me belonging was always a big issue, i guess after school and a time where i certainly did not belong to anything or anyone my greatest wish was probably to turn things around. to be seen as who i am, not who i seem to be. i am not sure where i am going, actually i wonder every day. today i belonged, but then i didn’t again – my so called life. welcome.<\/p>\n
i believe.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
i went out with my hockey team last night. i don’t know, but at some part i ended up standing in a corner of the bar by myself. and all of a sudden images started flowing through my head. austria, sweden, finland, belgium – now being back here. all of a sudden i felt lonely….<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1063","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-miracle-drug"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mindwork.net\/myblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1063","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mindwork.net\/myblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mindwork.net\/myblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mindwork.net\/myblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mindwork.net\/myblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1063"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/mindwork.net\/myblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1063\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mindwork.net\/myblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1063"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mindwork.net\/myblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1063"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mindwork.net\/myblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1063"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}